Sitting on my couch thinking of all the things I needed to do today that didn’t get done so they go on to my list of to-do’s for tomorrow, is a stressful feeling. I have a mountain of papers that either need to be filed or thrown away, children’s art that I’d like to frame, junk mail I don’t know why I keep…and then I see something on it that has sentimental value that reminds me of my family. I kept a Colombian coffee coupon that I will never use but the moment I see the word ‘Colombia’ I feel such a strong connection. It’s such a strange feeling. It’s almost an obsession and am really hoping that this feeling will find some calmness. I get so excited the second I see a fellow Latino on tv even.
I’m shaking my head at my pile of papers and all of a sudden my brother Juan Pablo calls. Instantly my stress fades away. He knows just what to say to tuck away my worries, he shares with me how much he loves having a sister a year apart. I’m so content and feel so at peace when he talks about my home in Colombia. He tells me more about the family. Every few sentences my brother says, “Te amo princesa or Te amo mi reina, or Te amo muñeca”. I melt and then back to whatever he’s talking about. I’m picking up so much more in Spanish one word at a time. Juancho has been so helpful! When he talks sometime I get lost in his words and just study his face, like a blind girl would feel wanting to know every curve, dimple, and shape of one’s face. I look at his eyes and study the shape of his eyes and see that we have the same eyes. I study his cheek bones, his chin, his jawlines, his nose, his teeth, his smile, his laugh lines, his eyebrows, his forhead. I never realized how much detail a face truly has and how intrigued I am with our similarities. Its one of the best feelings knowing I look like them after growing up in a family I looked nothing alike.
Tonight’s ending was simply perfection. Every moment I have with one of my siblings is one of the most precious gift I could be given. They’ve become the ones I go to often, the ones I want to hang out with even if it’s via cell phone or video calls. They’ve become the best friends I could ever ask for. I’ve told my brother some of my deepest secrets, some more wishes and dreams in my life, and I can’t tell him enough how much I adore him. I thank God for my brother! ❤
Tomorrow I will return to my piles but with a smile 🙂